“In matters of the heart, it is right that men should lead and women welcome and guide that leadership. She is his helpmate (Gen. 2:18). Her goal is to give her man all the help he needs to lead well….The guidance that she provides him comes mainly in two forms: in helping him think clearly and in encouraging him to act confidently.” Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart, p. 97
What a wonderfully biblical picture of complementary roles. He leads and she welcomes his leadership; but she also actively participates as his helpmate.
For Brian and me, the stewardship of our finances has been a training ground for our roles. I’ve sought to serve him by keeping track of our finances. He has sought to lead by utilizing my gifts to help him think clearly and act confidently when making financial decisions.
To give you a little window into our lives: I’m the money conscious one, and Brian is the memory maker. I’m saving every penny and he’s giving away every dime. That’s a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the picture.
As you may have read on this blog, I recently turned 30. To celebrate my big day, Brian told me he had planned a few surprises. So when my birthday rolled around, I was a bit nervous about where he was going to find the money to fund his set of surprises.
When he mentioned the idea of taking me to Washington, D.C. for an overnight, I anxiously inquired: “Where are you going to get the money for that?” Hardly an expression of gratefulness, support and encouragement for his leadership!
You see it’s not that we didn’t actually have the funds available. It’s just that I would have preferred to save the money instead of spend it on an overnight. And while Brian is committed to prudently saving, he was also determined to bless me on this occasion.
In the end, Brian decided that we would take the overnight. And I’m so glad we did. We had a wonderful trip and made memories that will last a lifetime. Once again I was reminded that this man is called to lead me and that things go well when I follow his leadership. Next time, by God’s grace, I hope my words and heart will better help him to think and act.
