girl talk

God of Our Seasons

Scripture provides ample evidence that God sets the boundaries for each season. God determines when one closes and a new one begins. He is in complete charge and sovereignly rules over every season of our lives. And his purpose for our lives in each season ultimately cannot be frustrated.

Proverbs 16:9 declares, “The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.”

Nebuchadnezzar said about God, “All the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, and he does according to his will among the host of heaven and among the inhabitants of the earth; and none can stay his hand or say to him, ‘What have you done?’” (Dan. 4;35).

The prophet Jeremiah professed, “ I know, O LORD, that the way of man is not in himself, that it is not man who walks to direct his steps.” (Jer. 10:23).

All too often, we arrogantly think we are in charge. We imagine that we’re planning and deciding our life’s course. Who are we kidding? We need to humble ourselves and acknowledge, “God you are in charge. And I humbly accept your plan for the changing seasons of my life.”

We can trust this God who is in charge because we know his purposes are always directed for his glory and our good (Rom 8:28). As author Elisabeth Elliot insists, “Everything that happens to you has come through the hedge of His love.”

What comfort and rest this brings to our hearts!

As we seek to make the best use of time in every season, we can be confident that God’s divine wisdom and perfect love direct his purposes in our lives.

But maybe you’re still wondering: what does it look like to make the best use of time in my season?

Next week we’ll suggest some of the best bargains to be found in the different seasons of our lives.

We hope you’ll find a few deals that are too good to pass up!

(This week's series was adapted from our book, Shopping for Time)

Changing Seasons

Think back five years ago. Was your life different from the way it is now?

Maybe you weren’t even a Christian at that time. Perhaps you have since gotten married or graduated or changed jobs or moved to a new place or had a baby (or two or more!). You may have experienced a life-altering tragedy or a surprising success.

Even if you don’t feel as if your life is dramatically different, change has occurred, however imperceptibly. You’ve probably walked through relational changes, experienced physical changes, learned new skills, or developed new interests.

Most significantly, if you are a believer, Christ has been conforming you to his image. Undoubtedly your life is different from the way it was five years ago. And the same will be true five years from now.

That’s because our lives are made up of changing seasons.

It tells us so in Ecclesiastes: “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” (3:1). This passage goes on to list fourteen couplets that cover the range of human activity.

Our lives are never static or stationary. New seasons keep rolling in—each with its own unique joys and challenges. In fact, just about the time we adjust to our present season, it’s time to make way for a new one!

A woman may pass through many seasons in her lifetime. Here are a few:

Childhood
Adolescence
Singleness
Marriage
Childbearing
Mothering preschool children
Mothering school-aged children
Mothering teenaged children
Empty-nesting
Menopause
Caregiving to elderly parents
Grandmothering
Widowhood

This is not an exhaustive list. There may be additional seasons you will experience and ones you will never pass through. For example, certain women may remain single throughout there lifetime, and not every woman will experience widowhood.

But we must understand the reality of our changing seasons if we want to “look carefully how we walk” and “make the best use of our time.” For the best deals vary from season to season. Last year’s bargain might be this year’s foolish purchase.

So, we must walk through each season with open eyes in order to make the best choices.

But our comfort is this: God orders the seasons of our lives.

Tomorrow we’ll consider this truth.

Good or Best?

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil” Ephesians 5:5-16

The phrase, “making the best,” means to “buy up, rescue from loss, or improve” the use of time. It is a metaphor taken from the merchants and traders of the ancient Near East, who aggressively pursued the best deals when they would buy, sell, or trade. (We told you this idea of “shopping for time” comes straight from Scripture!)

The idea of this verse is that we are to approach life in the same way we go after bargains. We need to discern the best opportunities life has to offer. Then we must seize those opportunities and make them our highest priorities.

Every day presents us with countless options for how to spend our time. However, only some are truly great deals. Only a few things are really important.

Our job is to figure out what those prime deals are—these key opportunities—and devote all our time and energy to them.

This means choosing not to do a thousand other things. It means saying no to a lot of enticing options.

Here’s where it gets tricky. Obviously, we don’t want the “bad deals” to keep us from what is truly valuable. We don’t want sinful pursuits to deter us from what is God glorifying. But it’s often the good things such as a ministry opportunity, a relational pursuit, a money-making venture, a leisure activity, or a hobby that hinders us from making the best choices.

It’s frequently the good things that distract us from the best things.

So how do we learn to spot the best deals and ignore the bad ones? What are the secrets to discovering life’s most excellent bargains? In the coming days, we will discuss how to become savvy shoppers of time.

But first there is one fundamental principle we must understand. We’ll consider it tomorrow.

Look Carefully

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil” Ephesians 5:5-16

Look carefully. It’s a sobering command, is it not? It means that we are to walk with the utmost accuracy, with extreme care, with caution.

We are not to trudge blindly or routinely through our days. We shouldn’t just let life happen and try to deal with the results, be what they may. We should not allow one day to flow into the next, being concerned only with the present moment.

No, we must look around. We must develop keen eyes. We must examine our lives. We must evaluate our present manner of living and consider how to prepare for the future.

After all, we wouldn’t dream of sauntering through a clothing store with our eyes closed, picking up whatever we touch, placing it on the counter, and hoping it would turn into a wardrobe. No, we carefully walk through the store with our eyes wide open. We consider style. We study the price tag. We evaluate quality.

This verse in Ephesians tells us to live the way we shop—carefully.

It means we look…

backward on our life thus far, so that we might avoid past errors and repeat former victories;
forward to consider where a plan or course of action may lead;
inside our hearts to examine our motives and the reasons for the choices that we make;
around and take stock of our present fruitfulness;
beside us for critique, help, and wisdom from fellow believers;

and most of all…

Look up and seek guidance from our Heavenly Father through prayer and His Word.

This is how to be intentional, purposeful, and, as this verse says, wise in the way we walk.

Life's Best Bargains

We women take our shopping seriously—especially in these tough economic times.

We scour the Sunday paper for coupons and sales. We haunt thrift stores. We track down bargains better than a hound dog on a scent. We’re experts in our trade. We know which time of year to shop for what items. We know which supermarket has the best produce and where to find the best deals online.

The reality is, however, we don’t often manage the time God has granted us on this earth with the same intentionality or skill that we bring to shopping.

While we constantly—almost unconsciously—plan, evaluate, strategize, and make wise choices when shopping, we often neglect to do so with the most important matters of our lives.

We wouldn’t dream of going to the grocery store without a shopping list, or buying a car without haggling over the sticker price, or purchasing new shoes without checking the price tag, but we throw away our time as if we had an endless supply.

As a result, we often miss out on the best deals life has to offer and end up paying big time in guilt, anxiety, and a lack of confidence that we’re really doing the will of God. More often than not, we’re overwhelmed by life’s choices and demands. Perhaps, most unfortunately, we lack fruitfulness in Christ’s kingdom.

But it doesn’t have to be like this. We can know for certain that we are doing all God wants us to do. Peace and joy and rest can be an everyday experience. We can live a life worthy of the calling to which we have been called (Eph 4:1).

How? By becoming shoppers of time. This isn't our bright idea. It comes straight from Scripture. Ephesians 5:15-16 tells us how to live like we shop: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.”

This week we'll consider what Scripture means when it tells us to shop for time.

So Worth It

As a young bride, I came across some wise counsel that has served me well through the years. Essentially, it was this: it’s often hard to do important things, but it’s worth it. It’s a hassle to get the house and kids ready for a sitter to go on a date night with my husband; but it’s worth it. It requires a lot of effort to arrange a personal retreat; but it’s worth it. It requires sacrifice to serve others in time of need, but it’s worth it.

Sometimes though, when I consider the work involved to bless my husband or a family member in a particular way, I back away from good intentions. Or, I get an enthusiastic start only to abandon my plan to bless a friend when I confront challenges or hurdles I didn’t anticipate.  But when I look back at times in my life when I have persevered, it has been oh so worth it!

This past weekend was one of those times: my four siblings and I got together in Tallahassee, FL to surprise my 85 year old mom for Mother’s Day. No, it wasn’t exactly easy. I had to pack and prepare to leave my husband and son behind. Two of my siblings and I drove fourteen hours to get there. On Mother’s Day we traveled another three hours to take her to the place she and my dad honeymooned 63 years ago. Then we drove fourteen hours home, and I’ve spent a week trying to catch up on all my responsibilities.

But to see how much it blessed my mom? It was absolutely, most definitely worth it!

A Glad Life

Would you like to see a picture of biblical womanhood—a portrait of a life lived faithfully before the Lord and in service to others in the local church? I cannot think of a more fitting image than our dear friend Madonna Aristorenas.

Madonna passed away last Friday after a six-year-battle with breast cancer. She was 39. But Madonna’s example and testimony is alive and healthier than ever. She leaves behind a legacy of passionate service to the church and infectious joy in Christ.

Carolyn McCulley penned a tribute to Madonna on her blog. There she quotes Madonna’s pastor as saying that despite her battle with cancer she had served in every major ministry in the church. In the world's eyes, Madonna had every right to be home feeling sorry for herself, but Madonna refused. She laid aside all thoughts of self and gave her life away for the glory of her Savior. John Piper says, “If you live gladly to make others glad in God, your life will be hard, your risks will be high, and your joy will be full.”

Madonna is in these words. She experienced hard things in this life and the risk was most certainly high, but she lived gladly to make others glad and her joy was full.

Please, take a moment and read Carolyn’s tribute to this most worthy of ladies. And look hard at your own life. Are you “living gladly to make others glad?” Where are you serving in your local church? How can you seek to live with an outward focus today? May Madonna’s life inspire you to honor the Lord in all that you do!   

Shopping for Time

Today, we’re pleased to announce that our little book, Shopping for Time has been released. We are so grateful to God for the opportunity to partner with the wonderful folks at Crossway Books. To learn more about the book, you can read a review by Leslie Wiggins of Tim Challies’ Discerning Reader, as well as an interview with the four of us. We hope this humble volume will serve to encourage, inspire, and assist you as you seek to glorify God with your use of time.

Unwelcome Tasks

Our friend, Valori, sent us another quote about redeeming the time that was just too good to keep to ourselves. So here it is for your benefit as well:

“NO unwelcome tasks become any the less unwelcome by putting them off till tomorrow. It is only when they are behind us and done, that we begin to find that there is a sweetness to be tasted afterwards, and that the remembrance of unwelcome duties unhesitatingly done is welcome and pleasant. Accomplished, they are full of blessing, and there is a smile on their faces as they leave us. Undone, they stand threatening and disturbing our tranquility, and hindering our communion with God. If there be lying before you any bit of work from which you shrink, go straight up to it, and do it at once. The only way to get rid of it is to do it.” Alexander MacLaren

Okay! I’m getting straight up from my computer to go rid myself of that unwelcome pile of dirty laundry which I should have done yesterday, but didn’t!

Unspeakable Peace

“In all your ways acknowledge him.” Proverbs 3:6

It’s a familiar verse. One we are often quick to quote and slow to apply. And yet, if obeyed, it can produce peace in your soul and mine during busy seasons. Charles Bridges’ provides fresh insight into this little verse. Consider his comments carefully:

"Take one step at a time, every step under Divine warrant and direction. Ever plan for yourself in simple dependence on God. It is nothing less than self-idolatry to conceive that we can carry on even the ordinary matters of the day without his counsel. He loves to be consulted...Consider no circumstances too clear to need his direction. In all thy ways, small as well as great; in all thy concerns, personal or relative, temporal or eternal, let him be supreme. Who of us has not found the unspeakable 'peace' of bringing to God matters too minute or individual to be entrusted to the most confidential ear?"

Proverbs 3:6 is our go-to verse when we’re faced with a big decision. We are often quick to acknowledge the Lord and seek His guidance in extraordinary situations. However, we assume we can “carry on…the ordinary matters of the day without his counsel.” God calls this self-idolatry and pride.
How often I live as if I don’t need God in order to clean my bathroom, or discipline the boys, or get dinner on the table—as if I am sufficient in and of my self to handle most things!  My lack of dependence upon God is pronounced in these “ordinary matters.”

And yet, as Mr. Bridges points out, “God loves to be consulted…no circumstance [is] too clear to need his direction!” He wants us to bring to him all our little decisions, our minor frustrations, our small dilemmas. He doesn’t just tolerate our questions—God LOVES to be consulted! Hasn’t he commanded us to acknowledge Him in all our ways?

A season of busyness may tempt you to anxiety, but as Christians, we are truly meant to experience peace in our souls each and every day. This precious, “unspeakable peace,” comes when we bring to God all of the ordinary matters of our day. 

So what were you going to do next? Before you get up from your computer, pause, read this verse and quote again, and acknowledge Him. Unspeakable peace can be yours for the rest of the day.